Big Brother’s chore assignment today was to eliminate my Kitchen Window Spider. Lots more fun than mowing the lawn or taking out the trash.
Obviously I wasn’t thinking too clearly when I made that assignment.
Giving a teenage boy a job like that virtually guarantees that said teenager will want to use at least one of the following 3 implements to complete the chore:
Luckily, we’re fresh out of ammo, and Big Brother decided that Water was his Weapon of Choice. After unraveling our backyard hose from a complicated knot (and observing that someone had sabotaged the hose by turning it FULL ON while this knot was in it) he aimed it full-force at the spider’s window.
A subsequent inside observation revealed that the spider has vanished (dead? or just hiding?) but shreds of thick wet spider web were stuck to the window. Big Brother, in his infinite Teenage Wisdom, took the spray attachment from my sink and aimed it STRAIGHT UP between the window and screen. I was watching from the backyard, hollering, “Let me get inside! The window TILTS IN FOR EASY CLEANING!” Like he cared. It was MUCH more fun this way.
I ran in and showed him how to tilt the window to wipe away the rest of the spider web, only to realize that Little Brother was still outside. With the hose. And he knows how to turn on the spigot.
Like I said, I should’ve known better.