In the continuing diabetes-tech-support saga, I spoke to Tech Support Rep Number 6 yesterday. We’re finally hopeful that we’ve hit on a solution to the problem (stay tuned!) I’ve been calm (because I’m not big on conflict) but firm (because I’m frustrated with this issue and want my kid’s glucose monitor to work like it’s supposed to) and I think the fact that I don’t call them and scream in their ears has put me on the “nice” list over there in Tech Support Land.
I did a little stress bakingthis week. But hey, if baking is all it takes to relieve the stress, and I don’t eat ALL the results myself, it’s all good, right?
I’ve made a do-able plan for scheduling out most of the book reviews that need to get written in the next month. Book reviews are one of the things I love about what I do, but the books tend to come along in bunches.
It’s been 7 weeks since I had any cola. Scary, the amount of willpower it takes to keep it that way.
We have officially reached the end of the two seasons that sucked the life out of our household routine: sports and theatre. The show closed Sunday, and yesterday was the final soccer practice (an anticlimactic one, since the last game was played Tuesday. But there was a pasta party scheduled, so they practiced. Anything for spaghetti, when you’re a high-school boy.)
Lessons were learned.
Playing a sport at the high-school level and participating in community theatre is going to have an academic impact. Which, of course, we knew, but we didn’t know to what extent.
There is no shame in grabbing a drive-thru dinner for your Renaissance Kid when you’re en route to the theatre on a performance night, directly following an away game that’s 45 minutes from home.
This week, my success is that we all survived the last week and its 2 soccer games, 4 performances, 1 music rehearsal (that was mine), Mass on Sunday and a set strike after the final show.
Now it’s time to settle in, to vacuum up the dirt left on the floor of my car by the soccer cleats, to make a new menu plan for November that leaves me some wiggle room to cook things that take longer than 25 minutes, to put away the Oxi-Clean and the bucket where I soaked the white home-game uniforms, and to hassle TheKid a little more about studying his algebra.
TheKid is sorry that his seasons are over. Don’t tell him, but I’m not. Sports and theatre are good for kids, but they do have a cost, and that’s measured in more than sports fees and show tickets.
—Middle Sister was home from college for a short fall break. It was nice having her around. The other day I was super tired and couldn’t concentrate, and she had nothing to do for a couple of hours, so we found a place to go get brunch–someplace neither of us had been before. It’s right in a harbor in our hometown, and we didn’t even know it was here. Since it was a beautiful day, we elected to eat on the waterfront deck. While we enjoyed our meal, we got to look at the fall foliage (just beginning to turn here in southern NJ) and admire the various boats, debating which boat we’d like to have if we were ever going to have a boat.
—I haven’t had any cola in a month. My house is free of Pepsi (my cola of choice) and Coke (which is a backup when Pepsi’s not available). Except for one ginger ale one day when my stomach was upset, I have had no soda since 9/21. I’d like to know when the weight will start coming off…I still crave it, but I’m not drinking it.
–TheKid’s show opens tonight (and closes Sunday) which means we’ve almost survived the Fall of Soccer and Theatre. Today is a big push: it’s an away game, almost an hour from here, that begins at 4. He’s supposed to be at the theatre by 6. THAT’S not going to happen, but they know he’ll be running in late, and it’s not like he has makeup to worry about. After today there are 2 more games on the schedule. I don’t know how postseason works. But I have been there for every minute of every game; the past couple of weeks we’ve teetered right on the edge of diabetes drama for several games. Fortunately he’s been OK, but it doesn’t do much for this mama’s blood pressure!
–Today’s fun: chasing down medical referrals for Hubs’ upcoming checkup at the cancer center as his 4-year cancer anniversary just passed. It’s always fun when you get different answers from different people. I have one more phone call to make before I can call the primary doctor and request all of these, but I can’t do that until after 9 AM.
T.S. Eliot wrote, “April is the cruellest month.” But T.S. Eliot was never a soccer mom whose Kid was also involved in community theatre–during soccer season.
I’m doing more driving now, just for one child, than I did when I had 3 kids without drivers’ licenses at home.
I saw October coming and it wasn’t going to be pretty. It was, however, going to be predictable. I had schedules for rehearsals, performances, soccer practices and games, a whole month in advance.
So I did something I haven’t done in quite a while–not since TheKid was involved in his first community theatre productions, way back in 4th grade. I made a meal plan for a whole month. Christine does this all the time, and it was her mention of it that made me realize that this was something I needed to do.
I use pencil for a reason, because things DO happen. I filled in (in pen) the commitments on the calendar so I’d know when it wouldn’t be a good idea to make a new recipe that requires several hours of simmering. Then I got busy filling in the blanks with the dinner plan.
I hung up the menu on the inside of one of my kitchen-cabinet doors. I check it in the morning to find out what to defrost. I tried to put items that use similar ingredients together–so the stir-fry that contains red bell peppers was planned in the same week as the sausage-and-pepper sandwiches. This way, nothing would be wasted.
We’re only 2 weeks into the month, but that plan has saved my bacon. It’s been one less thing to stress over.
The show closes in 10 days and soccer has only 2 or 3 more weeks to go. November should be easier. But I’m going to make the time to put together a meal plan anyway. These past 2 weeks have shown me just how worth it this effort is.
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This month I’m joining all the cool kids in the #Write31Days adventure! I didn’t pick a keyword or a theme, because just getting something written for all 31 days is challenge enough for me right now.
On Monday, the Secular Franciscans celebrated the Transitus of St. Francis, marking his passage from earthly life to eternal life in heaven. It is a solemn moment with a prayer service that includes readings from a biography of the saint along with the Gospel, Psalms, prayer and music.
I spent the day Monday putting out all kinds of fires, some related to the Transitus and others completely separate from it, but all serving as a distraction from what was about to take place. From missing copies of the readings to sheet music that didn’t include all the verses to a soccer practice that ran late and a request by someone I respect that I do something that would compromise my integrity (I declined), by midafternoon I was DONE and tweeted:
In the end it all turned out fine, at least as far as the Transitus was concerned. We were happy with the turnout and participation. The parts of the song I messed up because I was trying to track lyrics and guitar chords for a song with 7 verses went unnoticed by the assembly, who knew the song so well and sang so enthusiastically that I was basically drowned out.
As we enjoyed light refreshments and conversation after the Transitus, I observed to one of my fellow Franciscans that it had been a crazy day. She said the same (she was on the other end of the missing-readings problem, and had other things happening as well.) Later she emailed me and said that she remembers this happening every year. All The Things seem to go wrong on Transitus day.
Here we are, trying to remember one of the holiest people who ever lived, someone after whose example we wish to model our lives, and things are just a mess.
Maybe that’s what St. Francis meant when he talked about Perfect Joy.
Several months ago, I got a Facebook friend request that surprised me, from a mom I’ve been acquainted with for several years through school. Our paths have crossed through various sports and school parties, but we don’t know each other at all and normally wouldn’t get past that “how’s your kid doing?” type of conversation.
This mom is a confident woman. She’s successful in the business world. She’s comfortable in leadership positions.
In other words, she’s the opposite of me.
My own bad experiences in high school (I was the middle-class kid in a very small school populated largely by the Ivy-league crowd) lead me to instinctively fear people like this mom. And by “fear” I mean “do anything I can to avoid having to be near” such people.
That’s not conducive to getting to know someone.
That doesn’t help you dispel the crazy illusions you have that someone else, someone you really don’t know, leads a charmed life where everything is perfectly perfect.
My fear of confident, successful leaders, it turns out, is born of a bad combination of social anxiety and jealousy.
There. I said it.
Anyway, I accepted the friend request and didn’t think anything of it.
Over the past few months, this mom has shared some things that have opened my eyes.
She does not live the charmed life I thought she did. This is not because she was ever lying about her life–it’s about the assumptions I made given the little I knew.
Her life is not perfect. She has problems too. She has trials and struggles and difficult situations.
She’s just like the rest of us, trying to make the best of things.
This mom has been gifted with confidence and leadership abilities. She uses them at work and she uses them as she volunteers to help her children’s schools. She’s a hard worker, not standing on some perfect pedestal.
So for those people who say that spending time on social media is useless, I’m sharing this story. If I had not made this Facebook connection, I’d never have learned that someone I thought was so perfect, who had it all, has problems too.
I’d never have had the opportunity to feel less jealousy and more compassion.
I’m still working on the social anxiety part, but this is a big step in the right direction.
Still plugging away at making a routine happen around here. I went to the gym (once) and did a Resurrection Mile (twice). What’s a “Resurrection Mile”? I go to Resurrection Parish, and on one of our two church campuses, there’s a parish center with a gymnasium. The building is open weekdays from 9 to 3 for people to come in and walk laps around the gym. Our parish has daily Mass at that location 3 days a week, so I’m trying to go over and walk my mile (20 times around the gym) after Mass. I listen to a podcast on my phone while I walk! I’m catching up on Among Women and Girlfriends this way.
One thing I did that I never do: stayed up to watch a TV show that started at 10 PM. Actually, the fact that I intentionally watched a TV show is astonishing enough. But “Designated Survivor” hooked me from the promos and did not disappoint. Did you watch? What did you think?
So far this week, it’s been one unscheduled thing after another.
I don’t usually do schedule changes well. I like to know when things will happen. And yes, I do have a Google calendar so colorful that my older son compared it to a quilt:
Things that happened that weren’t on my color-coded calendar: my daughter’s car wouldn’t start on Sunday and had to be towed to our mechanic. She had a doctor’s appointment Monday to finish an immunization series required for her nursing-school clinicals. So I got to drive back and forth to LaSalle twice on Monday, because the car wasn’t ready yet and she had to get back to school to study for a test.
Fortunately I knew on Sunday night that I’d need to do this, so I was up and working early Monday morning. I managed to get my work done for the day, get to Mass, do a load of laundry, clean both bathrooms and make a good dinner in addition to all the driving.
On Tuesday I spent an hour or more preparing for a meeting, but the others who were supposed to attend the meeting were no-shows. I spent another hour or more stressing about that. I also baked some cookies.
I was doing pretty well with all that unscheduled stuff until this morning when TheKid missed the bus. He’d made the bus for 6 school days in a row and I was hoping this was a trend; now we’ll need to figure out how to get him back on track for tomorrow. I tried not to yell and poison the morning. I didn’t raise my voice, but we didn’t part on happy terms today. (I know I’m breaking the Small Success “rules” by saying this here, but here I am, back to trying to figure out how to get TheKid to build good habits and respect other people’s time.)
At long last, summer is over and everyone is back in school. TheKid had his high-school orientation day yesterday. They toured the school, got their school-issued tablet PCs, learned about their options for extracurricular activities, had a picnic lunch, went to Mass and had pictures taken.
He was out of bed before Barry Gibb got to the part in “Tragedy” where he sounds like he’s being tased (this song is the current musical torture device I’m using to wake him up.)
And he made the bus.
This is only the second time in 9 years that the bus (provided by the local public-school district) has actually showed up on the first day of school. I didn’t have to call the transportation office and pester them about why there was no bus.
Tuesday he had a soccer game, and I drove 45 minutes to the hosting school only to discover when I got there that their athletic fields are 2 miles away from the school. That wasn’t fun. I have a plan in place now to double-check all soccer-game directions by visiting the host school’s website. And scrolling all the way to the bottom of the very long home page, because that’s where they hide this information.
I don’t know what most parents do about going to their kids’ games. I never made it to too many games or track meets for the older kids, because TheKid was in grade school that dismissed at 3 and he wasn’t home until at least 3:35. We went to the local games and home games, but that was it. They’ll probably complain that it’s not fair that I go to all his games now. Honestly, driving an hour each way to a game (like I’ll do today) and sitting outside for over an hour in 95-degree weather (like I’ll do today) isn’t super high on my list of fun things to do.
But I’m worried (maybe needlessly, but I worry) that TheKid will have a blood-sugar issue during a game, and the coach might not be ready to handle that. The parents’ meeting the other night didn’t help reassure me on this matter–the varsity coach told parents that if our child is injured at a game or practice, he should see the trainer before we take him to a doctor. Well, that’s fine if it’s a home game, but if the game is an hour away (like today’s game) and the trainer is gone by the time the team bus returns to school, I’m not going to wait until after school tomorrow to get the trainer’s opinion on whether my injured child needs medical attention–just because the trainer will “make sure the players get back on the field quickly and doctors make them wait weeks to return.” I feel like we were being told that the athletes’ health is less of a priority than a winning record. Maybe that’s not the case, but that’s how I interpreted it.
So I struggled about deciding to make it a priority to attend the games. Right now, for my own peace of mind, I’ll drive the hour and sit in the heat and be there, checking that glucose-monitor app and just keeping an eye on my kid. Once the game is over and I know that all is well, I’ll leave in my car, because he has to stay and watch the end of the varsity game and then ride the team bus home.
In other news, I have a couple of articles up at CatholicMom this week that you might like:
Thursdays at CatholicMom.com begin with a look at the past week’s Small Successes!
Honestly, I kind of feel like I’m spinning my wheels right now. Or maybe “running around in a hamster wheel” is a better way to describe it. Either way, I’m just feeling scattered. I took my scattered self to Adoration today and left after an hour, no less scattered than when I’d walked in.